Stop preparing what you want to say before identifying why you want to say it!
By Unknown - September 06, 2018
Stop preparing what you want to say before identifying why you want to say it!
I spend most of my days training and coaching people who want to get better at influencing others. Most of them carefully prepare what they want to say, sometimes add slides to their words and even memorize the whole thing (god forbid!). And then I walk in and ask: why do you do it/ what do you want from those people? You won’t believe the number of people who stare at me in silence trying to come up with an answer to that question. Strange phenomenon no? Preparing what you want to say without having a clear idea of what you want to achieve?
Eventually, with a little help, they come up with an answer and tell me they want money, a contract, a decision or a job from another person. Which triggers my second question: what should that other person then believe so they give you what you want? Most of the time, I get some vague answer to that question, like: that I am the best fit, or I have the best product… Don’t tell me you do the same? Well, then I can guarantee that you will be preparing a ‘brag-talk’ rather than a belief changing conversation. Key to successful influencing is starting from need based objectives: What should the other person believe about each of your topics in terms of benefits for him. Get that clear and you will see how it will transform the design of your talk.
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